Living and Active Week 3

I just have to note that as I sit here and type this I have a little guy squished up against me sitting behind me.  I am on the edge of the chair and he has his little toes tucked under my butt and his knees resting on my back with one hand pushing on my back as well ever so lightly but firmly.  If I move a little he moves closer.  I had to share this because I smile and savor moments like this.

It also reminds me that we as mothers need to make sure we do what we need to do and sometimes that means being creative about how we get it done.  I am able to type this because I am allowing my little guy to do this.  Had I wanted to make sure I sat not dangling off the seat and more comfortably this post may not get done.  Because right now, my boy wants to snuggle when I am trying to get something done.  So we both compromise. 

I exercised today to start week three by leaving my sick older guy in bed with a snack, and a movie and telling him just where to find me.  I took my youngest downstairs with me to play in our sandbox while I exercised.  I got it done while answering questions about what I was doing and sometimes having a little guy try to do what I was doing, which is pretty cute I might add :)

It wasn't perfect.  It isn't perfect but it works.  I am learning more and more that if I want to be able to do it all (work, motherhood, get healthy) I need to accept imperfection.  It just wont happen any other way.

With that said, Week 2 went well on the exercise front.  I got my 4 days in with ease and contemplated a day 5 but then lost my motivation by the evening when I was able to do it.  Should I have embraced the desire at the time and done it or should I not push too much because I tend to be someone who dives in 1110% as I mentioned last week and then burns out?  I don't know the answer.  What I do know though is I am onto week 3 and going strong with the exercise piece.  I have been alternating two videos that I like and am not bored so that is good.  In fact, I am finding I am able to give a little more now and that feels good too.

Now, the diet.

That part sucks to be blunt.  I have removed all snacky stuff from my house so that helps.  I need to try adding tea in at night to see if that helps.  I need to start prepping food more.  I think that would help.  I want quick and easy.  If I had a chef and could just say I want a fruit salad and would have one presented like that to me I would pick that over chips.  However, I don't.  So I pick the chips that are quick and easy.  Sigh...

Last weeks "Soul Food" was about not worrying about tomorrow and it was so fitting.  This week's is about cravings and is again, so fitting.

"For everything in the world- cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he does- comes not from the Father but from the world." 1 John 2:16

This is definitely one I need to ponder.

Exercise.  Here is my plan for the week:

Today I exercised already.  Yay!  Tuesday and Thursday I hope to catch Zumba class.  Wednesday I may do Yoga...not sure yet.  Friday is a busy day so I will skip that day.  Saturday I hope to catch Zumba again but if not, I will do a video on Sunday.  If I do all that I have planned that will be 5 workouts.  We shall see.  I am set though to be sure I get 4 workouts in and have planned flexibility in case a day happens that I cannot exercise.

Now I must go because I just felt my little guy slump and realized he had fallen asleep behind him.  Bless his sweet little soul.

Living and Active Challenge Week 2

So some of you may remember I posted about doing the "Living and Active Challenge".  I am still doing it and completed week 1 on Sunday; therefore starting week 2 on Monday.

My husband and I went away for our anniversary Friday into Saturday (first overnight since having kids....5 years ago!) so those two days were out.  I had planned to complete all my workouts by then but Wed. I was so tired I went straight to bed.  That meant that despite my lack of motivation, I still dragged my butt to the basement and did my workout Sunday to be sure to get my four 25-minutes workouts in for the week.  I have done two low impact workouts from Fitness Blender after following a recommendation from the person running the challenge and I like them.  Super "easy" (easy as in can do them without much equipment or space) but a great workout.  I am sore!

The diet piece is still hit or miss.  I am working hard right now on trying to pay attention to when I am hungry and when I just think I need to eat (usually the moment my mind isn't pulled in 100 directions), which is usually after the kids and hubby are "settled" for the night.  So, of course, not only a bad habit but also a bad time to be indulging in the habit.  I used to be a tea drinker and a few people have suggested that.  I have also tried gum to try to indulge the need to "chew something".

I am doing better on my water intake and my fruit and veggie intake is improved but nothing to brag about.  I fall into the old "quick, easy and tasty" category and that is never a good combination.

But, that is what I like about this challenge.  It feels unpressured to perform.  Unpressured to "measure up".  It focuses on four 25- minute workouts a week five weeks, which feels doable.

Last night I was sore so I did yoga (boy my body needed that!) and that is also what is great about the challenge, it doesn't tell you what kind of workout it has to be.  Just move your body!  The other thing I like about this challenge is the spiritual component and the buddy system (I have a great buddy...a great friend and inspiration.) As many of you know, I am always seeking further spiritual guidance, insight, support so this is great.

Last week we focused on learning, "One person is easily overpowered.  Two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not easily broken."  Ecclesiastes 4:12

This week we focus on "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

The first week was an excellent reminder to me.  The second week is something I need to work very hard on.

So...here I am going strong still.  Not without constant internal struggle but I am still doing it.  I completed week 1 and am on to week 2 not noticing or feeling much change other than being sore :) I don't expect much change though only into it two weeks.  The only change I am noticing and shocked about a little is I am MORE tired.  Usually a regular exercise routine and focusing on eating a little better gives me energy.  Hmmm....

So Wednesday was a day off for me as I had some other commitments that took most of my evening.  Today I plan to do Zumba.  Friday I will do another video.  Saturday I will take off to take my boys apple picking and Sunday I will take off as well.  Or maybe not if I am feeling motivated.  But, I must be careful.  I am one to run 110% into something and then burn out.  Better to pace myself I think...hopefully then I will stick with it.  Hopefully...

Going Gluten Free: Muffins!

So thanks to my cousin and fellow blogger, Heather, I found a muffin mix I like.  I love King Arthur's Gluten Free Pancake mix and am pretty sure their cookie mix is good too but I haven't tried it yet for fear I will like it best.  Right now I use Betty Crocker's mix and it is good.  And even my picky husband likes them, "better than the real kind" so I hate to change because Betty Crocker's is cheaper :) 

With that said, since I really like King Arthur's pancake mix (seriously, they are awesome...you can't taste the difference and again, my very picky husband doesn't mind them) and at the recommendation of Heather, I tried their muffin mix.

I personally thought the muffins were a little bland.  I tried a recommendation with frozen berries of washing them and drying them to prevent staining the mix.  It worked like a charm but I wonder if I "washed off" some flavor?

Otherwise, beautiful, delicious, moist, and most importantly, my GF son LOVES them!

Yay!  Another GF victory!

I just saw someone post about using cinnamon chips in theirs.  I bought chocolate chips to try and did use a cinnamon streusel on top of my blueberry ones but cinnamon chips may be a good one to try!

Going Gluten Free: Brownies

I have been making "boxed" gluten free stuff for my family (initially I was one step below that and buying all pre-made!) as I slowly learn how to go gluten-free.  I found a box of Betty Crocker Gluten Free brownie mix and gave it a shot.  Let me just say....AMAZING!

I thought they were better than any boxed brownie I have done thus far.  The rich chocolaty flavor was amazing.  They almost tasted homemade!  I would say the rest of the family liked them too since half the dish was gone in one sitting and my husband (Mr. Picky) actually brought one to work.

As I have said before, I would like to eventually go all homemade but as I navigate this new area of cooking/baking I am starting slowly so as not to completely overwhelm myself or my family.  I have moved from all pre-made to partially made where I buy the mix and do the rest.

My biggest hang-up is I need to find a flour I like.  We can't do almond flour as many do because of allergies and I tried coconut flour and not being a huge fan of coconut, so far I am not sold on  it.  In looking at packaging it seems a combination of flours is best but what those are and how much of each?  Your guess is as good as mine at this point.

So, for now, I am happy to be to the point I am at.  And you know what.  Eventually when I get to all homemade I will be glad to know which pre-made and boxed things I like best because lets face it, there are times when you want to do quick and easy :)

Taking Time....

My husband and I are all about the kids.  If we go somewhere 99% of the time we are taking the kids with us.  We always said that when we had kids someday it was going to be because we wanted them.  We would never have them simply because "that is what you do".  We love our kids more than life itself and would do anything for them.  With that though, comes often putting 110% of our life into them and therefore forgetting to take time for "us".

The last time we had a night away was when I had just found out I was pregnant with Handsome 1.  So yes, that means just shy of 5 years ago.  Yes, you read that right.  5 years.

Although we pride ourselves in the fact that we adore our children so much it isn't the best for your relationship as a couple.  You need that time to connect.  You need that time as adults.  You need that time for each other.

So, since this year is a year where we have no pregnancy, babies or nursing children right now we decided to do our first overnight since having kids.  We went away last year for our anniversary but just for the day.  I was still nursing Handsome 2 and didn't want to be away all day and night from him for that reason.  So although we had wanted to do something a little extra special every 5 years, we did something a little extra special to mark 6 years.

That is 6 years of marriage but 18 years of being together!  As much as it doesn't feel like 18 years it does in other ways.  What I mean by that is we have grown so much.  Changed so much.  Learned so much.  18 years is a long time.  6 years married in this day in age is a long time.  So we decided to celebrate that.

We booked a room in a nearby town we have grown to love.  We visited last year so we went back this year.  We stayed in a pricier fancier room just to make it a little more special.  Oh it was heaven.  We also stopped at several wineries along the way.  I am not a drinker for those of you who don't know me but learning about how they grow their grapes at one vineyard to how they make their wine at another and tasting several along the way was fun.  We even bought 3 bottles that we each seemed to like (despite the fact that although my husband drinks, he is also not a wine drinker.)

We really had a good time.  We enjoyed the chance to relax.  To not have a schedule.  To not have to worry about anyone else but ourselves.  To just enjoy each other's company.  And for me at one point, I just enjoyed the silence and the chance to lay in bed past 6:30 am just because I wanted to :)

I hope we take time to do this again.  Maybe it will be another year before we do but I sure hope we take the time to enjoy each other again amoungst all the many days of enjoying our kids with each other.

Happy 6 years hun.  Here is to many more.

Poop Talk

So I just put it out there plain and simple.  This is going to be a talk about poop.  I need to talk about it because it is an integral part to what Handsome 2 is dealing with and I wanted to update on him.

We had a follow-up with the GI specialist and the naturopath.  Both want us to continue with gluten-free for now (which I suspect will turn into forever...still coming to terms with this).  The GI doc said to call him around the 1st of October to "check in" and if Handsome 2 is doing well (as he suspects he will be and I pray he will) then we will wait for a follow-up in Nov.  If he is not doing well we will discuss what we will do testing-wise.  He said to defer to the naturopath in terms of his probiotic but that in his opinion after 30 days you have replenished what you need.  The naturopath said given his 11 days (yes you read that right) without pooping before being helped by a laxative, we need to do another round to settle his system.  Both agree we need to use a laxative if he gets to day 5.  We don't want to stretch is GI system so that it starts holding more and more stool.  Since the appts we have needed a laxative for 1 of 3 stools.  He had one that was somewhat formed and somewhat runny but the naturopath said to expect it given his 11 days he went before going the last time.   The next one required a laxative but was more formed.  This last one was only 3 days (yay!  We are working on every 2-3 days going on his own) and was not really formed but not a huge mess as he has had frequently.  So.....I am cautiously optimistic.  VERY cautious.  So much so that I considered deleting my comment about any kind of optimism.

We have a height and weight check in October.  I pray so much that he is becoming more "regular" and that he has gained something.  We have been 6 months now without any height or weight gain.  Breaks my heart to know we are at 6 months for that and 4 months of GI issues. 

I recently was trying to find chicken nuggets in the grocery store that were GF.  Now I know some would say chicken nuggets are not bad to do without but when you are 2 and your life is turned upside down it seems you (and maybe even more so your mother) craves some sense of "normal".  Normal to me is a trip to McDonald's once in a while and some chicken nuggets.  I haven't figured out McDonald's yet but I am working on the chicken nuggets.  With that said, I found some but they had honey.  Ugh.  Remember my little guy is sensitive to that too!  So....I found another package and was reading if it had honey and Handsome 1 asked if we were done soon (shopping) and I just said yes I just had to check to see if these nuggets would hurt his belly and Handsome 1 said, "You need to see if it has gluten?"  I just said yes rather than explaining the whole honey thing too.  (Side note:  Uber proud of my oldest...he gets the whole gluten thing, what Handsome 2 can't have, etc...so sweet at just 4- almost 5- years old.)  Anyway, a man walked by with his wife and said, "They are.  We get them for our son".  Long story short we ended up chatting about having a child that has gluten intolerance.  His poor son suffered longer and was even spitting up blood before he got a diagnosis.  He kept saying how lucky we were to have caught it early before more damage was done.

Two things.

First, I had never thought of it that way.  I always thought, "My kid is only 2 and he already has to limit himself.  There are things he has never tried and never will get a chance to now due to his issues.  THAT makes me so sad.  However, this man was right.  Some people suffer for a long time and damage can be severe.  Thank God we did catch this early. 

Second, it was SOOOO nice to talk for a moment with someone who really gets it.  Nobody can truly relate to me except the one who is living it.  I know people who are gluten free but not someone who has a child that has to be.  My brother has Crohn's Disease.  Devastating disease.  He survives right now with infusions every 6 weeks.  Terrible disease.  He is gluten free.  But he also doesn't know what it is like to have a child with it.  My heart aches for my brother.  I love him and I hate his disease.  However, again, only a parent knows the ache of having a child with gluten intolerance. Only a parent with a child with gluten intolerance at such a young age knows how your whole life changes and how gluten is in everything it seems.  Only a parent of a child with gluten intolerance can tell me, "Those are the nuggets you want.  We feed them to our son and this pizza is good too."  It felt good.

So that is where I am at.  Still learning.  Still praying.  Still in some denial.  Still sad.  Still frustrated but cautiously optimistic.  Still so in love with my littlest boy. 

First Day of School! First Day of School! First Day of School!

For those of you with kids you know where this phrase comes from :)  This was the first thing I thought when I woke up Tuesday morning, Sept. 3rd.  Although I wasn't excited like Nemo.  Neither was my big boy who was attending his first day of school.  We had just come off of camping over Labor Day and we were used to lazy days of sleeping in.  Plus, this was a big milestone for us...my oldest was attending school!  Yes, it is only Pre-K but in my mind this is the big step because he is now in the system and in the school he will be in for 9 more years.  My big boy has officially grown up in my eyes.

A happy but nervous boy.  His breakfast of choice was French toast and I packed a special drawing I made for him to find in his snack box :)

The night before he was nervous. I could tell.  A little more reserved.  Didn't eat much for dinner.  Didn't want to help me prep anything (i.e., pick out what new clothes he wanted to wear, choose his snack for the next day, pack his bag.)  I didn't push him.  Mentioned it a few times and let it go.  He also had a meltdown about not wanting to try hamburg (we have a rule...you must try the food on your plate, you don't need to eat it though.)  I know the meltdown was a result more of the stress than anything else.

Then the morning came.  Again, I could tell he was nervous.  I tried to go as slow as possible in the morning to try to not make anything too rushed for him.  My mother came over to take a few pics and see him off at his request.  She also watched my youngest so that it could just be me and Handsome 1, which was nice.  I brought him to school because I thought it would be too overwhelming for him to get on the bus with kids age Pre-K through 12 and I had to peel him off me for the trial bus run the week before when it was just the Pre-K kids so I brought him to school.  We hung his bag, turned in his school supplies.  I went over with him where his snack was one more time and assured him his snuggly (Roar) was in his bag and with his teacher's permission, he could leave the class to go in the hall and see it if needed.  Thankfully, she said that was fine.  We did some "bonding" a squeezing technique his OT said would be good to do to help calm him.  I showed him on the clock what time it was and what time he would leave (something we used to do with preschool until he was comfortable.)  We had lots of hugs and kisses and a little "I don't want you to go" and then he was off with his teacher and I was out the door. Wow.  A lot easier than I thought for both of us!  No tears were shed by either of us.  I guess we were both more ready than I thought.

Before I knew it, it was already time to meet him for the bus (it is a half day program and only the Pre-K kids ride the bus home).  He looked so proud getting off the bus and happy to see MeMe, Mama, Handsome 2, Uncle T and his girlfriend and Buster waiting for him.  He said his day was great and his teacher texted me to tell me it was as well.  Phew....

I have made the right decision.

He could have gone to K but he would have been the youngest.  I decided to hold him back one more year.  He could have stayed at his preschool but he would have been with kids a lot younger.  I decided to send him to Pre-K.  He is happy.  I am happy.  This was the right choice.

Day 2 made me nervous.  This was the day that was hard for him when he attended preschool.  This time I had his brother with me too.  However, he did awesome again.  He was excited to show his brother his school and classroom and excited to show off his brother a little too I think :)  We parted just as yesterday except no bonding needed, no clock check and no clinging just a little.  Awesome!  Guess who cried though?!  His brother!  He didn't want to leave big brother.  Too cute...

Now we are on Day 3 and all is still going well.  We ran a little later than last two drop offs and we hit drop off traffic.  He was worried he would be late.  LOL.  He entered the room and didn't look back. I am so incredibly proud of my big boy.  He has come so far.  His teacher says he is adjusting really well and he tells me he is enjoying it.  He wishes he could stay longer and looks forward to each day.  He says he has made a friend.  So proud.  He has grown from a shy little boy who wouldn't do anything without Mama stuck to his side to a boy who is excited to adventure out on his own in this new territory and I couldn't be prouder of him.

Way to go Handsome 2.  Way to go.  Momma is so incredibly proud of you.  Keep up the good work.  Mama loves you.

Note:  As I finished typing this on Day 3 I got a text from my son's teacher.  She said he had fallen asleep in class and she let him sleep until it was time to get on the bus but that he just seemed "off".  He was quieter.  She said she asked him if he felt well and he said, "Yes, just tired."  She wanted me to know and said there was a bug going around.  ALREADY?!  Then I got a call from my Mom.  He had gotten off the bus and looked horrible.  She took his temp and it was high so I ran home and brought him some medicine.  He ran a high fever all night and medicine had a hard time keeping it down.  He threw up once at my Mom's when he tried to eat...he was so hungry.  He had to miss school the next day and his OT. Three days in and already he was sick.  Yuck.

Bus Ride!

So my big boy finished preschool (so sad...I LOVED his teacher and school.)  He has grown so much in the year and a half I had him there.  He grew from a shy boy who wouldn't leave my side to a confident boy.  I debated on whether to keep him there and had full intention of doing so as I loved the program (huge focus on the individual, health and good nutrition...all natural foods, organic, no preservatives or dyes, etc.) so much and he enjoyed his time, but most of his friends were moving on to the pre-k program so I felt he should be among kids his age.  He could have gone to K as he made the cut-off but I just didn't feel he was ready.  So pre-k it is for him!

He got to do a practice bus ride the end of August.  The bus ride went well.  Handsome 1 was definitely nervous.  Handsome 2 was excited!  LOL. We had tears but not from me! Handsome 1 cried and I had to bring him on the bus and offer tons of praise and encouragement but he went.  Handsome 2 cried because he couldn't go.  LOL.  My kids were the only two crying and for totally different reasons!

The bus brought them right to the school and they got to check out the playground, take a picture of the "class" and meet teachers and potential classmates.  (They got to meet the teacher and explore the classroom in an individual visit a couple weeks earlier.)

Handsome 2 said he had fun and is excited to ride the bus.  He loves the playground.  I can tell he is still very nervous though.  He is definitely his mother's child.  I know I was the same way :)

"Living and Active" 5-Week Challenge from "Peak313 Fitness"

So I don't talk about this much on my blog because the topic is probably the most personal to me.  It is probably my greatest struggle. 

My weight.

I don't want to sound like I am blaming all others for my weight because I know it is all me. 

However, what I also know is I am a people pleaser.

I can't say no.

I spread myself thin trying to make sure everyone else is happy.

I live for my children and my family.

I put everyone else first.

This means putting myself last.

This means skipping workouts.

This means skipping meals.

Another thing I know is that I am a stress eater. 

Give me some stress and food (preferably carbs and sweets) will "fix" it for me.

All of this of course is a HORRIBLE mix.

I am working on it but I am a complete work in progress.

I do get exercise more now (loving my Zumba classes and my Zumba ladies!) but I don't go to every class because once again, I put my family first.

If I am at home then I am most likely NOT going to exercise.  By the time I am home I switch to domestic mode and I cook, clean, mother, etc.  "Finding time" to exercise doesn't happen until after the kids are in bed and by then, I am exhausted/highly unmotivated.

Get up early then you may say.

I can tell you right now that WILL NOT happen.  I have NEVER been a morning person.  Make me get up in the morning and I will be one crabby apple. Ask me to get up to exercise...yeah right.

Excuses right?  I know. 

What about my diet? 

Well that is another story.  Besides the stress eating I just plainly don't have the will power.  I try and do well often for a few months and then I give in to a craving.  An urge. Then I go into a tailspin.  Then I have a hard time getting back.

So there you have it.  My biggest flaws.  My biggest imperfections for you all to read.

Why am I writing this all you may say?

Well for one, none of us are perfect and while we often talk about the wonderful things in our life I think it is important we talk about our flaws too.  Those things that make us human.  We need to show our vulnerabilities so others can see that we all struggle and perhaps relate.  And for us, it allows us to own them. 

It is also the LONG way of telling you I just signed up for the "Living Active" 5-week challenge.  It seemed simple enough, a friend was doing it, and I liked that it mixed Scripture with health.  So I did it.  And for the most part, I am looking forward to it. 

It starts today.  I have to memorize this verse:

And I need to find a "buddy" (I am doing this with a friend of mine).

 

And I need to get at least 25-minutes of exercise at least 4 times this week and "check in" with my buddy twice both on a spiritual level and a physical one.

 

I like its simplicity because I KNOW it wont be that simple for me.

 

My plan is to continue what I have been doing for diet.  Working on eating less late at night (a huge problem for me...I am also an idle eater...don't keep my mind fully engaged and I will eat.)  Working on eating more fruits and veggies and drinking water is also something else I am going to work on.  And for exercise, my plan is to try the video Monday that was posted for lower impact exercises.  I previewed it Sunday and it looked doable but will definitely be a good workout for me.  Tuesday will be Zumba.  Wednesday if the weather is nice I will most likely mow the lawn.  Thursday will be Zumba again.  I would typically space it out more but we have a busy weekend planned and I want to make sure I get what I need to in and will incorporate as much exercise as I can into our weekend but will feel good knowing I got some scheduled exercise in before the weekend hits.

 

So that is it. 

 

A 5-week challenge.

 

Oh and I need to take before and after pictures and measurements.  To be honest, I am not wanting to do this part as I don't think I will notice any change.  However, I will do it just in case I do ;)

 

Ready or not, here I go.

Going Gluten Free

So the biggest change in our household with Handsome 2's digestive "issues" has been going gluten free.  For my husband it has been a huge change (although he and my oldest still eat gluten) but for me it was not that big of a deal initially as I have been eating mainly gluten free over the last year to help with the inflammation from my endometriosis.  However, what I often pushed off in my head was the fact that my son would not get to just "eat what he wants when he wants" anymore and this realization kind of hits me in the face from time to time.  Like when for a special treat my oldest asked why they could no longer go to McDonald's.  Or when we recently attended a family gathering that was a potluck and there would be cake.

Gasp!

I can't control that environment.  I can't tell everyone to make sure there isn't gluten in everything they make.

He  can't have the cake!

The panic subsided quickly as I took a breath and realized I would focus on what I could control.

I would make a fruit platter and dip (always a hit) that EVERYONE could eat.

I would bring some snacks I knew he could have.

I would make gluten free cupcakes!

And so I did.

I even "inconvenienced" the host and asked if I could see the back of the chip bag if she still had it (of course she obliged and did not act inconvenienced)but realizing it is okay to ask and not feel bad about it was a step for me.  I read the packaging of things not yet opened (I am getting really good at reading labels I am telling you)  I offered the snacks I had brought.  I was honest with my son with why he couldn't have a certain food, "It makes your belly hurt 'bug'" I said and that seemed to satisfy him.  

I did it.  

We did it.

We survived.

We only had one instance of, "NO!!!  He can't have that!" As I leaped into action.  

I would say that is the only thing I have not yet relaxed on.  I don't let him out of my site.  I just don't trust that others fully understand "gluten-free" and what that means as well as what it means for him if you give it to him. (Just today my Father-in-Law attempted to give my son a cookie...a regular gluten filled cookie.)

I am sure that will come with time.

It is a challenge.  

It is hard.

I want to cry sometimes and I want to throw in the towel. 

I don't though because this is my son.

My son I would move mountains for.

My son I make special food for just so he can enjoy it too.

Oh and the cupcakes?  Everyone said they were great. My oldest said, "You make the best cupcakes Momma!" (He only eats the frosting though and I didn't have to change that.)  I however thought they tested a little "ricey" though so I will be trying another GF cake mix next time.  Trial and error is the name of the game for me right now.   Trial and error and lots of learning. 

 

We are doing it.  We are going gluten free. 

measured up motherhood defined

Another great post by Rachel over at Finding Joy.

I have said a hundred times it seems but will say it again she is so brutely honest and she speaks right to my heart.  We as mothers need to hear more of what she says.  We need to share our struggles just as much as our joys.

Here is what she said that hit me the strongest:

You are mother. 

Lets measure that for a while. Not based on the externals that you do, but on the little things - those little things matter moments. 

You are the perfect answer for the skinned knee. You know which child loves his pbj cut into triangles and which loves the squares. You know how to look them in the eye and tell them you love them. You know how to roll yourself out of bed in the morning even though you're exhausted. You can split the last of the cereal in equal ways. You can find the missing soccer shoe in thirty two seconds. You can discern between cries between the I'm irritated cry and the brother took my toy cry and the I fell down and hurt my knee cry. You can answer to the words mom fifty two times in what feels like fifty two seconds. 

When I feel like I am not doing enough or I am not enough I need to remember this. She is right. I am the one that knows all these things. I am the one that does all of these things. I am a mother and we all need our mothers.

If you would like to read her whole post you can find it here:
measured up motherhood defined

Life With Boys...

...means interesting conversations in the supermarket.

I just have to share our grocery shopping trip the past two weeks.  If this continues, I think the store is going to lock its doors when it sees us coming!

Two weeks ago I took both boys grocery shopping with me as I often do.  Handsome 2 loves to go anywhere and do anything that Handsome 1 does and Handsome 1 LOVES to grocery shop with me so both boys have been coming regularly.  Also, Handsome 1 doesn't like to be left out so if Handsome 2 comes, so will he :)  I know some Moms like grocery shopping alone, it is their piece of sanity.  I agree that it can be fun to get out alone AND it goes a lot faster, a lot smoother, and the chance to "browse" is nice too.  However, I do enjoy the time with them...the trip surely is never dull and these past two weeks, they have made it even more interesting.

So back to two weeks ago, we were doing well (for the most part I am very impressed with how my very busy and very active boys act at the age of just 2 and 4) in the grocery store (especially since it usually happens after an already busy and probably to them, boring day) when suddenly the topic of basic conversation changed to the topic of farts.  Yes, farts.  Why it changed to that I have no idea.  However, soon talking about farts escalated and there was lots of giggles and lots more talk.  I quickly calmed them and thought we had escaped too much humiliation until we got in the check out line.  That is when Handsome 2 announced, "I farted!" (giggles) "I stink!"  (more giggles).  Then Handsome 1 chimed in with laughing too and announcing what his brother did.  I quieted them again but I must say I smiled a little inside while thinking, "This is my life.  My life with boys."  :)

Now, we are shopping again this week and we decide we need to use the bathroom.  We all crowd into the handicap stall so we can all fit since Handsome 1 doesn't want to go into another stall alone.  Now I will pause here for a minute to say I am waiting for the stare or look of disgust from someone who is upset I am bringing my boys into a ladies room but let me tell you I will NOT be having him go into a men's room alone anytime soon.  If there isn't a family restroom, they will be with me. 

I digress though...so Handsome 2 is going potty and he is so small still he has to stand on the seat to reach it and then Handsome 1 uses it but he can just walk up to it.  Then I take my turn and obviously sit.  Handsome 1 says, "Handsome 2, when you get bigger you will sit on the potty too!"  I correct him and say,  "No he will stand like you cause he is a boy."  (In retrospect this was my mistake, but I am always honest with my boys and open with them and I had no idea the conversation would go where it did.)  Handsome 1 says, "But why do you sit and we wont?"  I say, "Because you have a penis and you can stand.  Mommy doesn't have one so she can't.  She has to sit"  Now I know some of you may be thinking wow, way too much info but again I remind you I have always been open with my kids and we use the correct terminology for body parts, I have been open with any questions they have and I don't act like body parts are gross or off topic, etc.  I am matter-of-fact I would say.  My Mom was this way with us and I never grew up ashamed or afraid of my body, etc. and I hope I create this with my boys.
Again, I digress though.  So Handsome 1 goes on to say that he, "knows I have one."  He has "seen it." (I will tell you he has seen me naked but I don't make a habit of prancing in front of him or anything.)  I correct him and say, "No.  Mommy does not have one.  Mommy is a girl and girl's don't have penises."  Then I pause for a moment as I realize I have never told him what girls have.  It hasn't really come up.  As much as I am open and honest I try to follow their lead and offer info only of which they ask.  I decide this is the time to tell them what girls have.  "Girl's have vaginas" I say.  "Ginas?!"  Handsome 1 says, "That is a funny name...why would they call it that!?"  I tell him I am not sure and leave it at that.  However, Handsome 2 doesn't leave it at that.  Handsome 1 is satisfied but now Handsome 2 feels the need to chime in so we spend most of the fruit and veggie aisle trying to get Handsome 2 to stop announcing he has a penis and saying, "It right there" complete with pointing.  Sigh...

Finally, Handsome 1 chimes in and says, "Could we stop all this privacy talk!"  I second Handsome 1 and thankfully Handsome 2 obliges.

Oh the life with boys.....