An Update on Our Little Trooper

First let me say I have been so strong (with a few weak moments of course) with Cole's surgery. I have been sure in our decision and confident in the outcome. That is until we arrived in the office.

I turned after checking in Cole in to see him playing with the toys in the waiting area. So happy, so full of life. So oblivious. I lost it right then and had to go to the bathroom to recover. I kept tearing up after that. Then, when I heard he needed a breathing tube (note sure why I didn't figure this out before...ignorance was bliss I think) I lost it again. I was with it enough though to ask for a penile block versus an epidural that anesthesia wanted to give him.

Cole was nervous at this point and clung to Daddy. They gave him a mild sedative but it had no affect on him! I was so distraught off and on that we decided to have my husband (he ironically was a mess up until I started losing it) go back with him as they put him under (plus Cole was still holding tight to his Daddy.)

I lost it again when he rounded the corner and my last words to him were "Bye Buddy." (I am tearing up just writing this part!) My husband wasn't gone that long and wouldn't discuss how it went so I know it was not easy. The nurse came by and I was so upset she asked if I was okay...lol.

I had no shame as we waited in the waiting room (front in center of the update board of course!) and cried a few more times. It went pretty quickly thank goodness and as we were brought back to see him I heard him crying for his Dada. My husband told me it wasn't him when I said I heard him but it was! As we rounded the corner I could see the nurse was holding him trying to comfort him but he wasn't having it. My husband took him and after some rocking Cole fell asleep.

They woke him to check for drainage and check vitals as well as get some pain meds in him because they couldn't do it through IV because he tore it out on his way to recovery. I guess he was a fighter both going into and coming out of anesthesia. We got 3 Popsicles into him (he usually doesn't like Popsicles but he kept asking for more!) and then it was time to go home. He was pretty loopy when we first saw him but he out of it by the time we were headed home.

We were so blessed to have so many people send us thoughts and prayers and a wonderful fellow church member had a connection with a minister at the hospital we were at so this wonderful minister met us heading into and coming out of surgery. She also had the cutest handmade angel a woman she knows makes and has blessed at her local church. Our local minister stopped by to see us and left a toy for Cole too. I also received many calls and texts to check in on us which was so kind.

When we got home Cole was ready to play and he slept great last night! We are trying to just do Tylenol and Motrin versus the narcotic and have had success thus far so we pray we can continue this route. I had to remove his bandages today and it was so stuck to his skin he whimpered and begged me not to do it but he hung in there. He is such a trooper. He made me save the bandage to show Dada when he gets home so he can show Dada how brave he was :) I was happy to oblige because he has been so good. When Dada did get home he asked Dada to take off his diaper so he could show him his stitches and how he no longer had a bandage :)

He got 20 stitches so I thought that would be a mess but it doesn't look too bad. He is SOOOOO swollen right now though and where the adhesions were removed it is such a mess but I pray it will all look "normal" soon and this is the end to his problems. He is pretty bruised in one spot too (most likely where they put the block in) and even has some pen markings still on him from the surgery :) I fear so much another adhesion while he heals and I just pray hard that this and any other complications does not happen.

Tomorrow we will tackle a bath which with each adhesion removal was very painful so we shall see how this goes. The strength my little man has truly amazes me. Thank you so much for prayers and I ask that you continue to pray for a speedy and as pain-free as possible recovery for Cole. I also ask that you pray that he have no more adhesions or complications so that we all may finally put this behind us. May God continue to bless my brave little soldier.

Some pictures from yesterday and today (I didn't take any before or after surgery...I know some do but I couldn't do it...he did look cute in his Jonnie and he wanted to bring it home actually, he was happy he got to bring his Papa orange socks home though (Papa has an orange tractor)...

The ride home...Popsicle stained face, new chuggers (Coco and Brewster from Chugginton) in hand from Daddy for being so brave, and a DVD in the portable DVD player (which was such a blessing since we got stuck in traffic in the town outside of ours!)

Looking upset because he was actually running down the hall to play in our bed when I stopped him for a picture :) Notice the band still on his leg? He didn't want it cut off for a while. I think because I made the mistake of saying we would cut it off and he had enough cutting for the day!

Cole this morning (see him in the left hand corner of the train?) He insists on having his Thomas tent in his bed now. I took it out after he fell asleep last night though because it made me nervous. He is napping in it in his crib right now though!

This morning having breakfast watching Madagascar (he is getting spoiled with movies if he asks for them today.) Notice the extra cereal bowl and smoothie for froggie? :) Cole even leaned down to Froggie and asked him if he wanted a spoon too...apparently Froggie did :)

Mom Monday

Today I am taking a break from the typical "Mom Monday" posts to ask for your prayers. At 9:30 A.M. today Cole is scheduled to be in surgery for a circumcision revision. We ask for prayers for the anesthesiologist and urologist along with all others involved in his care. We pray for a quick and uncomplicated surgery. We pray Cole handles anesthesia well before, during and after surgery. We pray that our son is as pain free as possible and that he handles the medications well. We pray for a speedy recovery that results in no further circumcision complications. We pray for strength for us to be strong for Cole. In the simplest of terms, we pray for the health and well-being of our son. May God watch over him and keep him safe.

"It Doesn't Matter..."

"...Sponge Bob matters."

Before I get into this post let me just say I despise Sponge Bob. Not only do I find him annoying but I also feel he teaches no good lessons unlike other cartoons do such as Chugginton (which Cole just LOVES.) Despite this, my husband let me son watch it once and he seems to like it now so occasionally it ends up on our T.V. especially because sometimes when we are allowing T.V. time, no other cartoons are on the T.V.!

Now, back to the post. This came about when I was trying to tell Cole (we have discussed it a few other times) about his surgery, which is now tomorrow. I told him about how we would go to the hospital, he would get some medicine to make him sleepy and the Dr. would be fixing his penis. I explained Mommy and Daddy would be there the whole time and he may be sore like he was before but he would be better soon. Cole listened intently and then said this, "Don't Matter Mommy. Sponge Bob matter." LOL. It was like he was telling me, "I am not going to think and worry about what is to come like you Mommy, Sponge Bob is on right now and that is all I care about. I will worry about the rest when the time comes."

So maybe I am reading too much into this. Maybe in hindsight I should have turned the TV off. Or, just maybe he really did think that. Regardless, he is right. However, as his Mommy I can't help but worry about my baby and what tomorrow will bring. May God bless him and watch over him and all those involved in his care tomorrow. May God grant him a speedy and successful surgery with a speedy and as pain-free as possible recovery. Amen. Oh and a little strength for Mommy and Daddy so they can be strong for Cole would help too :)

"Poop, Poop, Poop"

This is what my son said as he grabbed a diaper and wipes from his room, came to me and told me to lay down and when I didn't do so, lifted up my pantleg and began wiping my leg. LOL. Recently my son has really been into babies and just taking care of others in general. I think he is feeling the "itch" for a sibling too ;-)

Fertility Friday- Humor Again

Maybe yet another reason for fertility issues? :)

November Thanksgiving

I save this last November Thanksgiving (Thanksgiving Day itself) post for my husband. He is the trickiest to write about because where he and I begin and end is sometimes hard to tell. We have been together so long (dated for 12 years, married for 3 years) and we met so young (I was 14 he was 17) that I don't really remember much of life without him. We have also had enough time to know each other as well as ourselves. We have been together long enough to take advantage of what the other gives and to as I said, be so "together" in so many ways that we almost forget what the other does for us because it is so routine now. So, as I said, this is the hardest post to write because my life has had him in it for so long with him right by my side through it all that it is hard to imagine what life would be like without him (aka what he brings to the table for me.)

I guess if I really think about it the thing I love most about our relationship is we talk. There is rarely something that bothers the other that does not get discussed. I think this is so important in a relationship and is something I always was so grateful my husband possessed since a lot of men don't do the "lets talk about this" thing.

Next, my husband is my best friend. There is nothing I don't tell him. He hears the good, the bad and the ugly.

He is also an amazing Dad. I knew he would be when I met him but watching him with my son and seeing how my son looks at him with such admiration is amazing.

Also, my husband is my rock. It is rare that he is weak when I am too. Frequently he is often strong on the outside for me because he can see I am crumbling. This is one trait that I am just starting to realize and try to be more cognizant of.

I think when thinking about my husband this is what I would want: a caring, loving, family guy who is strong, hard working and shares my values and loves me for who I am. My husband is that and I am forever grateful.

Today I am thankful for my husband.

November Thanksgiving

This November Thanksgiving post I am thankful for my grandmother. My granfather (God rest his soul) passed away a little over a year ago leaving my grandmother heartbroken. She has told many of the family she is ready to go herself and I can understand that but God will I miss her when she does. I don't get over to see her as much as I would like because her dog does not like me. She keeps him despite his aggression to others, etc. because she promised my grandfather she would. I completely understand and I should not let that hinder me because she is a remarkable woman. She is an amazing cook and has a wonderful soul. She loves all her children and grandchildren as well as great-grandchildren with all her heart. She gives equally to all and would do for any of them (and has) all that she can. She has shown me and all of us nothing but unconditional love. She has been all a grandmother is "supposed to be" and more. Today I am thankful for my grandmother.

Wordless Wednesday

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my sister. I wrote a post about her not long ago on her birthday in October. My sister and I are pretty much very different people although as we have gotten older I think we are finding more common ground. I think this is in part due to us coming closer to the same place in life.

We fought a lot when we were younger because of our differences. However, now, I would say we get along pretty well. My sister is smart, beautiful and so easy to like. She reminds me of my Father in many ways (which is why they probably got along better than my Dad and I)...always has a smile on her face. You can't help but laugh or smile when you are around her. She is sensitive though too so she feels things deeply. She is of course great with Cole and he loves his "Ki-ki" :) Today, I am thankful for my sister and for the relationship we have grown. I know it will only get better with time.

Poll Results: What Would You Bring?

I am not surprised at the end result in this week's poll but am surpised at the number of people that voted that way. I DO remember (gasp!) what I picked this time and I picked to bring a person. My first thought in picking this answer was of the movie Cast Away. Tom Hanks needed socialization. I would too. More than that though, I thought two heads are bette than one. Perhaps that other person may have ideas that I wouldn't and that could help me survive and better yet, be rescued.

The first thing I thought when I saw the results was that answer speaks volumes about us as humans. We are social creatures. We need each other. Isn't that ironic? We need each other, we want each other around but yet we often pick on, mistreat and hurt each other. Hmmm....

So, anyone want to share why they chose what they did? I would love to hear.

Letters From Nature

There is a great giveaway going on right now HERE. I have always wanted one of these letter signs for our last name. I think they are so beautiful and unique but they are usually so expensive. What am I talking about? Those prints you can get of letters that are formed out of things in nature. For example, the letter T may be a picture of a telephone pole. Know what I am talking about now? If so and you are interested, check out the giveaway.

Mom Monday

You Know You're A Mom When...

- You leave your son for a minute or two at Sunday School and he doesn't cry and you practically throw a party over it because this is such a big deal for him.

- You snuggle up to a blanket your son brought into your bed and notice it is wet but continue to snuggle it only to realize it has pee on it!

- "Nakie Time" is a common thing in your house (only the little man is naked of course...don't think bad thoughts people!)

- You dance like a crazy woman over and over again because that seems to be the one way to get your son to eat his dinner some nights.

- Your son's upcoming surgery weighs far heavier on you than anything you have ever been through yourself.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for the blessing of motherhood. I never really "felt" that I wanted to be a Mom. My Mother and sister have always LOVED babies and kids. My husband has always known he wanted to be a Dad. Me, I didn't really have a preference either way. In fact, when graduating college I knew I did not want to work with young children and then, my job got a contract with a state organization that services young children. I dreaded it. Then, I began to enjoy it. However, I still wasn't sure if and when I would be ready for kids on my own. Then I was diagnosed with PCOS and Endometrisosis and didn't know if I could have kids. Then, I wanted them so bad. As I struggled through infertility I realized just how bad I really wanted to be a mother. Then, I had Cole and I realized how much I LOVE being a mother and I want more. I pray the Lord blesses us with another little bundle of happiness and health in the near future. I pray He has plans for even more children for us after that because motherhood truly is a blessing. Today I am thankful for the blessings of motherhood and with all of its scary and nerve-wrecking times too :)

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my current financial situation. We by no means are rich but we don't want for basic necessities and some luxuries either. Today at church a family was present that our church is spearheading the campaign for getting them a new home. The living situations they were in was VERY sad. In Sunday school the little boy (visiting us for the first time) said he had a joy he wanted to share during the "joys and concerns" time. Guess what he shared? "My family is getting a new house!" He was just happy to be getting a home that is safe, clean and meets basic needs. So touching. So today I am thankful for my family's current financial situation. We are very blessed.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for a print that is finally hanging on my living room wall. I know it sounds so simple but my husband finally got around to helping me hang it and it just puts a smile on my face. It is the first thing to hang on our walls in our living room after over 5 years in our home!

That isn't why it is so special though. It is a print of a painting a neighbor of mine did. He was a well known artist and I was very close with him and his wife. He helped me learn to read, tell time, and do art. That isn't the only thing though. This print also happens to be a painting of my father's side of the family's farm. It is just down the road from where I grew up and was the home of my great grandparents. I used to visit my grandmother there often and sneek a few candies from her candy jar :) I played in their field (even once swam in a huge mud puddle in their field) and I used to love climbing in their big trees that lined the driveway (they are now cut down.) The painting is from the back side of the farmhouse, which is what I used to see when my father would tow us by it on sleds with the snowmobile. It looks different now but the memories are still there. Thus, today I am thankful for this print hanging on my wall. It makes me happy to think we finally have something hanging on our walls in our living room, and what is hanging is full of very happy memories for me.

Fertility Friday- Humor

This could definitely be seen in my body :)

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my son's hugs,kisses and snugggles. I know this sounds so simple but a hug, kiss and snuggle from him just seems to make the worst day seem a little better. I was having one of those days today where all the troubles in my life were just weighing on me emotionally. After my son woke up from his nap he wanted to snuggle with me and watch a movie. We did just that and all my worries melted away for those moments. My day was better because of him so today I am thankful for my son's hugs, kisses and snuggles.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for books. I love to read. I used to read a lot more before I had Cole but I still always have a book and one magazine going. I love how reading can take you to another place. It can help you work through emotions. It can make you smile. It can make you think. Now, with Cole, reading is even more important to me as I share my love of reading with my son. He has more books than I can count and I love that. He loves to be read to and sometimes likes to read on his own :) Books bring us together. I love reading for the simple pleasure it brings me as well as the bonding I get with my son. Today, I am thankful for books.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for Fall. Fall is my favorite time of year. I love that the days are warm and the nights are cool. I love that a common outfit for Fall is a pair of jeans and a t-shirt with something to slip on over it if there is a nip in the air. I love the colors of Fall. I love the smell of Fall. I always smile when I get my first whiff of Fall. It reminds me of field hockey in my high school days. It reminds me Thanksgiving and Christmas are not far away...two holidays I love.

Fall also holds many special moments for me. I met my husband in the Fall. I got engaged in the Fall. I got married in the Fall. I had Cole in the Fall. I love Fall. Today, I am thankful for Fall.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for "me time." Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being around my little man. However, once in a while it is nice to just get out for an hour or so alone. I am so blessed that I have that chance at least once a week to do yoga. My husband watches our son while I take an hour and fifteen minutes and go do "yoooo-ga!" (you need to say it like this with a slow motion karate chop move if you are talking to my son.) :)

Yoga has been a great calming presence in my life. I used to do it at home but the last time I tried and I was doing relaxation pose, I had a little man breathing on me leaning over my head chewing a fruit snack :)

So, one night a week I get out for a yoga class. It is my moment to go inward. My moment to breath. My moment of me time. Today I am thankful for that.

Shutterfly Giveaway

I found out from another blog that Shutterfly is having an amazing give-away! They are offering 50 free holiday cards! Who isn't excited about that?!

Shutterfly is my go-to site for picture printing, photo books and I have used them in the past for holiday cards. I have not yet been disappointed with their products.

I have not used them before for calendars but saw one a friend of mine did recently and just may give that a shot sometime soon. And, if my prayers are answered and we have a new bundle of joy in the very near future I just may do my birth announcements with Shutterfly! The selection is just so amazing!

With that said, I have been looking over their Christmas card selection and they have an amazing selection! I keep going back to this one though I think what I like about it is its classic look. I also like the fact that you can fit several pictures on it. I am having a hard time this year picking just one picture for our photo card. I also like that is a flat card. I send out so many cards I tend to prefer these over the ones that are like a greeting card because then I feel I have to write in each one! This way, I can send each of my 50 Holiday cards out with great love but save my hand from any extra writing :)

With that said, what are you waiting for? If you read this blog you probably have one of your own so go ahead all you bloggers and get 50 free holiday cards from Shutterfly bo going here --> http://bit.ly/sfly2010

I know I can't wait to get mine! Thanks Shutterfly!

Mom Monday

You Know You're A Mom When...

- You make a delicious dish for dinner and someone sticks their tongue on it and says, "Don't like" and then refuses to eat it.

- You get excited about finding a pair of jeans that fit (and you aren't talking about yourself.)

- A second-hand store has become your new best friend.

- Pee on the floor or a chair becomes no big deal to you anymore.

- You are glad you have microfiber furniture and swear all furniture should be made from it.

- You sing, dance, clap and cheer when someone goes poop and pee on the potty.

- 1 more minute, 2 more minutes and even 5 more minutes is a common request in your home.

- You play outside until well after dark.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my brother-in-laws. I always have gotten along great with my brother and in college one of my closest friends was a guy, so when I "inherited" three more brothers when I got married I thought it was great. My brother-in-laws are all very different and bring a unique mix to the group. They come from a family of all boys so I am sure when I "joined the family" it required some adjustment for them. They all are so good with Cole, which of course I think is wonderful. What I love the most though is how great they are with each other. My husband and his brothers are so close. They would do anything for each other. It is so wonderful to see. None of them are married but I do look forward to the day a sister-in-law is brought into the mix either through my own brother or my brother-in-laws. Until then though, I am very thankful to have them so today I am thankful for my brother-in-laws.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for second hand "stuff." I know this may sound trivial but it is true. When my husband and I first moved into our house most of our stuff was either bought at auction, given to us or we acquired because it was going to the dump, etc. Our dishwasher for example is still in use (knock on wood) and we got it when a person where my husband works was sending it to the dump because they were upgrading their appliances.

I have also been so lucky to receive second hand clothes from several different people and I am so thankful for that. I also often shop at a local second hand store and just recently got a Fall coat, Winter coat and snow pants and a couple of jeans with adjustable waistbands all for at least half the price I would have paid if I bought them new. I feel like Cole grows out of his clothes so fast that it is such a blessing to be able to be given and buy very good quality second-hand clothes (and toys too!) So today I am so thankful for second hand "stuff."

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for friends. I am a fairly social person and although I enjoy my time to myself, I also enjoy being around others. I am so thankful I have friends to laugh with, cry with and just enjoy life with. Family is wonderful but friends are amazing to have too. I pray that I am able to give them as much or more than all the wonderful things they give me. Today, I am thankful for all my friends.

Fertility Friday- Should One Be Enough?

This Fertility Friday I will discuss the struggle I feel with being so fortunate to have Cole but yet yearning for more children. I struggle with this for a couple reasons.

First, I remember being the person who wasn't sure I could have any children and thinking, "If I could just have one" and I also remember feeling a little hint of anger when someone who had a child "whined" because they wanted more. Now, I want more than one (ideally 4...still not sure where that number comes from) and I am that person "whining."

The second reason I struggle is that I feel guilty. I am so amazingly blessed to have Cole. He means more to me than words can describe. So why can't I be happy with just him? Is that selfish? I try to say it is because I want a sibling for him but that is only have the truth. I just don't feel done is the other half. My heart breaks to think about the idea of not carrying another child, birthing him/her, raising him/her.

I am loving every moment with Cole but I still want more children. Is that wrong?

Sometimes people even say to me, "Well at least you have Cole." While I agree 100% with them I can't help it, my heart wants what it wants. Does that mean I love Cole any less? Does that make me ungrateful?

This is what I struggle with.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for insurance. As many of you know my brother has Crohn's Disease and therefore insurance is so important to him. I have watched him struggle to find a job (and he finally has thanks be to God) that offers insurance.

Cole has an upcoming surgery and thankfully, we have insurance.

My brother-in-law does not currently have insurance and he was recently diagnosed with MS. My heart breaks for him.

I am so thankful that currently I have insurance and my husband maintains insurance through his job. This is unheard of and I realize that. I am so thankful that I have insurance so that when major things such as surgeries like Cole's come up or even when the minor things like a routine doctor's visit come up, I don't have to worry. Today I am thankful for insurance.

"Happy 'Alloween!"

Yes, you read that right. This is how my son pronounces it and this is what we hear whenever we leave him, he leaves, someone leaves :) We told him to say that while out trick-or-treating and he got up the courage at a couple of houses and now he hasn't stopped saying it. The other night he yelled it to me from his bed for several minutes after we put him to bed. He says it every time his Daddy leaves for work in the morning and every time I leave after dropping him off at my Mom's for the day. We have tried getting him to say, "Happy Thanksgiving" since that is a little more appropriate now but no such luck. Who knows, maybe in our house it will be Halloween well into the new year. Happy 'Alloween everyone! :)

Potty Time

We got the "portable" potty chair and that has helped. Cole now goes on the potty every morning after he wakes up. We haven't gotten any consistency beyond that but we aren't pushing too hard right now.

Here is the potty in the bathroom...

And the potty in the living room where it is most mornings so Cole will go on the potty and not worry about missing Chugginton :)

And I have to confess that the potty even ended up on (yes I said on) our bed last Sunday morning at 5:00 AM when Cole woke up because his internal clock did not know it was time to "Fall back."

I have gone from insisting the potty chair be in the bathroom to allowing it to be a permanent fixture in our living room and even allowing it on our bed! Sigh...the lengths I go to :)

November Thanksgiving

Today on this Veteran's Day I am thankful for my freedom. I am thankful I live in a country that I have the right to vote, to voice my opinion, to make my own choices. I am thankful as well to all those who have served, are currently serving, or will serve our country. Thank you for sacrificing for all of us. Today I am thankful for my freedom and all those who serve to ensure it.

Wordless Wednesday- Mr. Potato Head's Glasses

Wordless Wednesday...Singing

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for music. Music was not really a huge part of my life until I met my husband. He has such a passion for it. He exposed me to all different kinds of music and his passion for it was inspiring. It has always been something that has connected us. When I got pregnant with Cole we played music to my belly. Now, Cole has the same passion for music that my husband does. It is not uncommon for Cole to be singing, dancing or playing an instrument. It brings our family together. Music is fun. Music can help you express feelings. Music can bring you to a place. Music can help you when you feel like nothing else can. I am so thankful for the gift of music and what it has brought to my family. Today I am thankful for music.

Poll Results: In An Ideal World...

Wow. You guys are so good at amazing me lately. I was not expecting this post to go as it did. While I am not surprised the majority of you agree that as long as a child is loved that is all that matters, I am surprised that a great majority of you also feel a child should be in daycare at least part-time. I was expecting most of you to say that in an ideal world a child should be with a parent. I was also expecting more of you to say that a child being with a family member is more important than you all did. So, tell me why you voted as you did. I am honestly curious!

Once again, I forgot the way I voted. If I think about it now I would say ideally I think a child should be with a parent. I used to feel that a child should be in daycare some and I struggled with this initially when making the decision about whether my son should be cared for by my mother (which ultimately was our decision.) Ideally, I wish it were me home with him but I am so thankful that since I cannot, my mother can. Cole has a special connection with my Mom and I love that it is with her (whom I have a special connection with.) Cole also has learned so much from her. He gets so much one-on-one attention which is great. He can count, knows his colors, knows his full name, knows Mommy and Daddy's name, talks in sentences, gets to be outside playing a lot, gets to have the sense of a pet since we don't have one but my parents have a dog, he stays relatively healthy, etc.

Many of you may say that is great but how is he socially? Well yes, he is more reserved and cautious but honestly, I think that is his nature more than a result of him not being in daycare. I have a friend (hi Ruth!) who has 2 boys who she stays home with but they are social butterflies. I take Cole to play dates and my Mom takes him out too. I do not regret my decision to keep him out of daycare. My MD is not concerned either. So for us, it works. I think that is the key actually. I think that as much as we would like to say that one particular thing is best for kids, it just isn't true. What is best for one child may not be best for another. With this poll though, I think that there is one answer that IS best for every child, to be loved. So, after all that babbling, I pick that :)

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my house. I was thinking about it and I realized I have often hesitated to

"make it my own" because it has always seemed like it was a "starter home for us." We always had the intention of building on some land given to us by my parents when we married. The time is drawing near where we need to either do it or not. That has made me realize as hard as I have tried, my house is a home. It is our first place we lived in together. We lived in it through dating, an engagement, our wedding, our pregnancy and now we are raising our son in it. It was literally a shell that my husband, father-in-law and father have helped turn into our place. It was uncared for and thus has a lot of quirks and it is small. However, it is ours and it is home. If we do end up moving, I will miss it so much. Today, I am thankful I have a house to call a home.

Mom Monday

You Know You're A Mom When...

- You have a stack of pictures just waiting to put in albums.

- You get excited about the toy catalogues that come in the mail.

- Junk mail becomes "mail" for your son.

- Halloween is lasting a lot longer than one day.

- You have had to use the phrase, "We do not lick that!"

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my brother. Words cannot describe how much he means to me. For as long as I can remember he has been sick. Something was always wrong with him. When I was younger I resented it. Just because he was sick didn't mean he should get away with everything. You know, typical kid feelings. Now that I am older though, I admire him. His strength and determination is greater than most people I know. His drive is amazing. If he sets his mind to something you bet it will happen. I am 5 years older than him so there is also a little bit of Mama Cub in me with him. Nobody better hurt him. He is also great with Cole and that of course warms my heart. He has a great sense of humor but also has a soft side. If I say I love him, he will say it back and that just makes me smile. Today I am thankful for my brother.

Cole's Friend Party

Cole's friend party was the first week in October but I am just getting around to posting the pictures. It was a very windy day so the decorating did not happen as I imagined and some mishaps occurred (popcorn blew off the table, plates went flying, the train Mylar balloons flew away, etc.) but I think a good time was had by all and that is what really mattered to me. We had pizza, cake, ice cream and snacks, opened presents, and had a train ride of course!

Here are the water bottles I made for the party. I did this for my wedding and decided it would be fun to do again.

Betsy and Anthony are our friends from church. They brought Anthony's grandparents, which was nice. Betsy is holding one of the party favors...I thought the boxes were so cute. I filled them with stickers, applesauce, Hershey kisses, cute little animal loofahs and party blow-outs.

Madison's Mommy is my friend from work. Madison and Cole have been hanging out since Cole was born (Madison is about a year older than Cole) so we have had a lot of fun times with Madison and her Mommy.

Nick-Nick and his Mommy, Anna. Anna is married to my cousin. Anna is the wonderful person who gives me most of Cole's clothes after Nick outgrows them. She is a lifesaver! Cole LOVES Nick-Nick as he likes to call him. Cole can be a cautious kid but he opens up quickly with Nick-Nick and enjoys playing with him. Nick is almost 2 years older than Cole but they play great together; Nick is so good with Cole. I look forward to many more play dates with them.

Cole and Me-Me. Cole was a little overwhelmed because he arrived fashionably late with his Daddy so most people were there when he got there. It was a little overwhelming for him so naturally, he ran to Me-Me for comfort :)

Madison and her Mommy, Kristin. Madison informed me that she didn't have time for this picture because she had to "pee now!" LOL.

The Perrys. Ruth is a friend of mine from high school. Logan worked with Tony for a while and the kids share a love of trains with Cole. We often rode the last train of the day with them over the season :) Abigail is in Ruth's belly. She arrived just days later. I was so surprised to see Ruth there as she was getting really uncomfortable. She was a trooper though and came out to celebrate Cole's big day wit him :) Since Abigail's arrival was to be any day, Logan's mother was at the party as she was up visiting the Perrys to be here for the arrival of Abigail.

The train!

Nick playing in one of the trains.

Cole and Nick applying the train's break :)

Cole playing conductor :)

A big hug from Nick-Nick :)

The party blow-outs were the biggest hit of the party I think! :)

My husband, ever the neat freak picking up the party as most of the people left. My Dad kept him company talking (I take after my Dad in many ways) and my Mother-in-Law kept the men in line watching over the clean-up :)

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my church. I found my church following the unexpected and very devastating loss of my best friend, Eliza. I was lost, I was depressed; I didn't know where to turn. My husband suggested I look to God. He said I needed something to "believe in." He was so right. I tried my husband's church out initially but it just didn't feel "right" even after months of going there. I think God led me to my church knowing it would be a good fit.

The first day I stepped foot in that church I was running late to the one I had been going to. I turned around knowing I was going to be later than I felt comfortable with and headed to find a church I knew started later. That church had its doors closed and looked "unwelcoming." I happened to drive by my church and noticed its open doors. I pulled in and the rest is history. The people were welcoming, the Minister was welcoming, I felt at home. Going on 3 years later, it is my home. I love it there. I find strength there. I find faith. I find love. Today, I am thankful for my church.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my Father. I have written before about just how wonderful my Dad is but I don't think I can say it enough. He and I are very similar so when I was living at home we often were the ones that fought the most. My Father is a man that literally almost everyone knows and likes. I often am told by others how lucky I am to have him as a Father. The love he has for his family is amazing. The hard work he puts into his job is amazing. His dedication is far above many. He literally would give me the shirt of his back if I needed it. The love he shows my son is unconditional. He is strong, opinionated and outspoken and I love it! He is a truly amazing man. I am so thankful I can proudly say, "he is my Dad."

Fertility Friday- Romance

This "Fertility Friday" I will address romance. Many, my husband included when we initially realized our fertility issues, say when they hear getting pregnant is not as easy as we would hope that at least we get to "practice" longer. I want to tell you all that this is not the case. In fact, actively trying to get pregnant cycle after cycle takes all the romance out of it. Among all the charts, medications, temperatures, timing, ovulation testing, etc., romance is the last thing on your mind. Talk to anyone with fertility issues and I can safely say most of them will agree. Trust me, it is easier said than done to not get caught up in all of this and keep the actual act of getting pregnant "romantic" still. You need to time things right and as you get let down cycle after cycle it almost becomes a "chore" at times. Something you know you have to do at a certain time each month. It is sad I know. Many would say you need to "spice it up", etc but again, even with trying all of that, trying to conceive really becomes the main focus. You just can't help it. Others may say, "take a break then" but if you have a very fast ticking biological clock that isn't always possible. So, this Fertility Friday I am here to say that romance and trying to conceive with some infertility mixed in are not a good mix. On the plus side, if you are able to conceive eventually, the end result makes it all worth it.

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my job. Yes, I, as many do, have complained about it. More specifically all the changes that have occurred lately. I just had it so good before it is hard! Anyway, I am so thankful to have a job, plain and simple. I am so thankful to have a job with benefit too! I am also happy to have a job close to home, in the profession my degree from college is in, and that is so flexible. I also love my co-workers and the diversity of my job. I also love that my job is one that "helps" others. My job allows me to make a difference in someones life and I just love that. So, today I am thankful for my job.

November Thanksgiving

I am thankful today for my mother-in-law. Many people do not get along with their in-laws but I actually like my mother-in-law. Yes, she most likely is reading this but that is not why I am being nice :) Honestly, she amazes me. She has from day one. She has raised/is raising 4 boys and is the primary caretaker of the house. She works full-time, tends to the kids, takes care of the house, cooks the meals and attends all the kids events. She is there for me to listen and guide me. She has amazing shopping saviness; always finding amazing deals. Most importantly, she puts up with her husband. I say this in the nicest way because my husband is VERY much like his Father and the things that drive me nuts about my husband she seems to let roll right off her back with my father-in-law. She has the patience of a saint, a heart like no other, and her generosity to others is astounding. I have a lot to learn from her. So today, I am thankful for my mother-in-law.

"It's Just a Leaf"

That is what I said to Cole yesterday morning as I was getting ready for work in the bathroom with him and his toys. We have a small bathroom and he usually follows me in and brings more and more toys in until I can barely move around him and his toys. I wouldn't have it any other way though.

So anyway, I look quickly at what Cole is pointing to. A brown thing maybe the size of a nickel. My husband often walks into the bathroom with his work boots on so it is no surprise that we find a stray dead leaf or even a piece of dirt in there (which is what I was beginning to think it may be and the next words that were about to come out of my mouth as I watched Cole reach for it.) He is a boy and a young child. He has to touch everything :) Then, I look a little more to the right as I hear "plop plop." Suddenly I am seeing 4 or 5 on the bathroom floor. I finally catch on.

It is poop!

Did I mention my son was having "nakie time" for peeing on the potty earlier?

I calmly tell him it is poop and that is okay. Let's try to go on the potty now. He obliges but says he is, "not sure" he has to go some more. "Not sure" is his latest phrase :) I then go and pick up his "droppings" and sanitize the floor. None of this grossed me out. You know what did and what bothered me a lot? The fact that he may have touched the poop and was now sitting on the potty with unclean hands. LOL. Guess what I did? What any Mom would do of course...I gave him some hand sanitizer while on the potty because I didn't want to rush him off but I also did not want him sitting there any longer with a hand that may have touched poop. He puts those hands in his mouth you know! And, he also has very busy hands while on the potty. Anything within reach may have gotten touched! So he happily obliged with the sanitizing while on the potty stating it was because he "touched stuff"right? I said yes. That is what I tell him when I clean his hands after we go to a store. I tell him we have to clean his hands because he touched stuff :)

I must conclude this post with saying Cole successfully left a small "dropping" in the toilet too. I was very happy about this but honestly I was just as happy about him going on the floor. I hear that with kids (boys especially) they tend to hold their poop for when they are in a diaper. Since Cole isn't the most excited kid about peeing on the potty I am thrilled he pooped anywhere but his diaper and I am even more thrilled about him going on the potty even if it was just what was left from him trying to go on the floor :)

Wordless Wednesday

November Thanksgiving

Today I am thankful for my Mom, aka Cole's Me-Me. My Mom and I have always been pretty close. I am more like my father so growing up I tended to fight more with him and get along better with my mother. This is not to say I did not fight with her, but for the most part, we got along and still do. As I have gotten older I can honestly say she is also a friend. I do not know where the line (if there is one) between friendship and Mom is drawn. She is who I turn to for advice, who I turn to when I am sad and who I often do things with like grocery shop and attend outings. She is who I turn to for almost everything big or small.

That is not it though. Since I have had Cole she is also the one who watches him while I work. She has seen as much of his life as I have in reality, and because of this, she is honestly more than just his Me-Me, she is like his second Mom. I grew up with this same feeling of love from my Dad's Mother and that love is amazing. Thus, I am forever thankful Cole has that with my Mother.

A mother is someone who often quietly does things and hardly gets noticed for them. As I have gotten older, and now have my own child, I realize this more. My Mom did and does so much she doesn't get thanks for, so this post is to say thank you for any time I have not.

This post I am thankful for my Mom, Cole's Me-Me, my friend.

November Thanksgiving

Since it is Election Day, I would like to agree with some other people's Thanksgivings on this day and say I am thankful for the right to vote.

As a woman, this is especially true. I love the fact that I can talk openly with my husband and others about issues, candidates, etc. I do not want to know what it was like when women had opinions but had to sit back and hope their spouses and other men made the right decisions that would impact them and their children. It was so great to be in line today and see men, women and children all waiting in line to vote (so great to see kids witnessing this great honor...I took my son!)

I am also thankful we live in a country where we are aloud to vote at all (men and women!)

Cole's Big Day...Birthday Morning

He awoke to a "choo choo" banner of course...

To find this loot from Mom and Dad...

He eagerly waited as Daddy took the tractor out of the box...

And then happily played with it...

Then it was on to his very own kitchen put together by Mommy and Daddy with love...

And finally, a breakfast of raisin bread toast with tractor at his side of course!

November Thanksgiving

Today I am linking up with Kate about what I am thankful for. I have done this before with my "Thankful on Thursday" posts. It just so happens that I was thinking recently that with all my self-pity lately with all that is "going wrong" in my life, it is time for a thankful post so this is as good a time as any.

I am sure you guessed it, but I am so eternally grateful for my amazing gift from God, Cole. I have so much more to be thankful for but he really tops the list. He is my sunshine in the biggest rainstorms. He can lift my spirit with just a touch of his tiny hand. My life revolves around him and I love it. I learn from him every day. Words cannot describe just how much I love my little man. For him, I am completely, totally, overwhelmingly grateful.

Mom Monday

You Know You're A Mom When...

- A look like the one in the picture above can melt your heart.

- You're son is having "nakie time" and starts to pee on you and the floor and you just let him finish.

- You have conversations about poop, pee, and toots and the difference between them.

- Your next concert is Sesame Street Live.

- You get candy on Halloween (aka the stuff your son can't eat) :)

- You spend Halloween washing poop out of a costume hours before it needs to be worn again :)

- You often find yourself falling asleep in the middle of a task (e.g., you start food in a slow cooker and fall asleep before it finishes).

- Your laundry seems to be a bottomless pit.

- You are endlessly tripping over a toy.

- You lose your mind trying to find something you know you put in your son's travel bag to visit his Me-Me but it wasn't there upon his return, only to get a call 2 days later from your brother who found said item in his lunch box.